15 days ago?!

I just noticed that I last posted 15 days ago. That's insane! I guess I owe you an explanation as to what I've been doing and why I haven't been posting. My days go something like this:

-Wake up
-Get annoyed by someone on the bus
-Spend a dizzying day at work trying to keep up
-Get annoyed by someone on the bus
-Make pasta for dinner
-Don't go to the gym because I have a cold/watch Biggest Loser
-Shower (yeah, I shower at night)
-Read
-Sleep

Throw in a trip to Columbus and Thanksgiving without a secure Wifi connection, and no blogging for me.

Anyway, I'm sitting here watching Legally Blonde for about the 30th time (seriously, I could do a 1-woman show playing each character and reciting the dialogue. . .but so can most other girls in their 20s). The real gem I'm waiting for is the "Addicted to Food" and "I Eat 33,000 Calories a Day" double feature on TLC. Can you beat that? No. You can't. It's not widely known, but TLC has the best shows (with the most direct titles) on Sunday nights. Example: "Half Ton Mom" followed by "Half Ton Dad".

Anyway, we're about to start the calamari trail at work (2 holiday parties this week alone!), so I'll post when I can!

Creepy Comparison

Watching The Wizard of Oz right now and just noticed that these two people look very similar:

Wallowing in Self Pity

Right now, I have a mild cold. Not terrible, but just annoying. I've decided to spend the day "Getting better", which really means I'm just sitting around watching cooking shows. Oh, I went to the library too. I don't know about you, but I hate getting sick. Usually, the realization progresses as such:

(small tickle in nose or throat)

Me: Oh no, I'd better not be getting sick!

(check Zicam package. . .see it expired 2 months ago)

Me: Dammit! No magic bullet this time. Fine. Fine. I'll just drink lots of water.

(nose starts running, need Kleenex)
Me: How did this happen? I've been eating my vegetables and working out? It must be work. Damn work for making me stressed out and compromising my immune system. Damn it! And why don't I have the lotion Kleenex on-hand? When do I use Kleenex except for when I'm sick? Why the hell would I buy the kind without lotion. Great. Now I'm in for a week of nose chafing.

(wake up)
Me: What the hell is going on with my throat? What day is it? Do I need to go to work today? Do I have any sick days left? No? Dammit! How little makeup and hairstyling can I get away with today?

My other regimin usually involves soup, saltines, and Gatorade. . .although I've had none of those this time around (only a mild case. . .don't need to pull out all the stops).

As annoying as colds are. . .they're nothing compared to the flu that went around last year.

Anyway, it's time for phase 2. . .spicy food to clean out the sinuses. Awesome, right?

What is your cold routine? Any good tricks you can share?

Well It's Been a Long Day. . .

I'm tired. Ti. . .red. But first - thanks to those of you who read my last post about crime in the area and passed it onto your friends. People do some crazy stuff and I think we all take our safety for granted (including me!). It's important to look out for each other.

Anyway, long work day. blech. Cabbed it home, hadn't had dinner yet. Went to boil water for pasta and. . .no water. We have no water. Naturally. So, 3/4 of a CPK take home pizza later, I'm curled up watching The Biggest Loser (oh, don't get me started on the irony of that one).

Here's the thing about this season of the show. . .these people are doing a noble thing. A tough thing. They are working out for like 6 hours straight, stripping down to sports bras and spandex in front of america and getting on what looks like a cattle scale (demoralizing much?). Then, they have to act excited by Jello and Extra Sugar-Free gum when you know they're like "Dammit! I just really want some f-ing chocolate!". (side note: I heart Jello. I would be very excited by Jello). Anyway, this season has three (possibly 4, but he's kinda stupid and mute, so I just project his wife's personality onto him) of the most obnoxious, vile human beings on tv. And yes, I caught the episode of Survivor where Johnny Fairplay faked his grandma's death. These people are worse. I'm rooting for them to gain weight or fall on the treadmill or something. Then I feel horrible. They also have some normal, decent people. I root for them. Especially because one is from Cleveland. Yay!

Ok, have to get up early to practice for a presentation.


"Tell me more, Maureen!" -you

That will have to wait for another time. In the meantime, Miss Bitchface herself:


Worst ad for Asics ever.

Be careful!

Hey blog readers -

I wanted to share an e-mail I received from a friend. No matter where you are, the economy sucks and people get desperate, so be careful! The e-mail is long, but worth reading.

"I know some of you have heard already...and whether you have or not, I
feel that it is very important that I pass along this story to you in
hopes that you pass it along to everyone else that you know. Something
terrible happened to my friend and I the other night and I want to spread
the word so that the same thing doesn't happen to anyone else.
I know that you hear stories about things like this often, and think that
it would never happen to you - I certaintly didn't expect this to happen
to me, but I'm telling you from first hand experience, it was the most
terrifying thing that I have ever experienced in my entire life.

On Wednesday, November 5, 2008 my friend Erin and I went out for the
evening in the Lincoln Park area (Chicago). After going to the bars we
went to get something to eat with a few other people, not far from my
apartment. Erin and I left the restaurant to walk home - around 1:00 am
- we didn't think it was necessary to take a cab - the weather was really
nice and we were only a few short blocks from my apartment. Our friends
offered to walk with us, but again, not thinking it necessary because I
have done that walk a million times.

We are walking and talking, now only about a block and a half from my
place, we are right next to the church I attend in a really nice
neighborhood with huge expensive houses. (What I'm trying to show is that
this can happen ANYWHERE) The next thing I know, Erin is grabbed from
behind and a guy appears in front of me - inches from my face - and grabs
me by the arms holding my shoulders and arms against my sides. It all
happened in a split second, out of no where. There were
5 guys that surrounded us, they must have been hiding in between parked
cars and bushes next to the sidewalk. Somehow I manage to break free from
the guy's grip but he grabs me and pulls my arms behind me.
Again somehow I break free, lose my shoes and start running. He is chasing
after me. I briefly look behind me and see Erin on the ground with 4 of
the guys holding her down. She is screaming for me and struggling. The
hardest thing I ever did was to keep running. I didn't even have time to
think, but my body's initial reaction was just to RUN, RUN FOR HELP NOW. I
knew that if I stayed to help her it was going to do no good....2 girls
and 5 guys are terrible odds. I felt so guilty leaving her, but I had to
get help. So I ran faster than I ever have in my entire life. I remembered
that there was a hostel right around the corner. I ran into the hostel and
as I'm screaming and crying tell the guys working we had just been
attacked. 2 of them run to get Erin and 1 stayed with me while I called
911. Within a minute the the police and ambulance showed up. I was
escorted back to the scene a few minutes later - still terrified and in
shock of what had happened...and so terrified to see Erin. As I approached
I could see blood all over the sidewalk. Inside the ambulance, Erin is
covered in blood. In the stuggle, her body is scratched and scraped and
bruised, and her hair is soaked with blood. Her head was hit against the
sidewalk.

We spent the entirety of the rest of that night and morning in the
emergency room. I only had gashed my foot open from running, but Erin
sustained a decent sized gash and had to get 5 staples in her head. We
both had to get tetanus shots as well. Luckily, physically we were ok for
the most part, but the emotional trauma from that experience is one far
greater than I can explain. We are both still absolutely terrified and
traumatized from what has happened. You feel so violated and helpless. I
am terrified to walk anywhere anymore, even in daylight. I shouldn't have
to feel that way in my own neighborhood.

The next day we went back to the scene to try to put the pieces together.
You can still see blood on the sidewalk. We were able to find a few of
Erin's bracelets and her headband, but nothing else. I also noticed the
Priest from my church and another woman outside the church talking. I went
to tell them the story so that they could inform the neighborhood. They
mentioned to me that lately ours and other surrounding neighborhoods have
been targeted. There was a woman in the neighborhood who was pulling in to
her garage, at NOON - daylight! she had her 2 little children in the car,
and as she pulled into her garage and the garage door was closing, 3 men
rolled underneath the door and were shut into the garage with her and her
children. They robbed her at gun point. This happened at noon, broad
daylight, in Lincoln Park. The last thing anyone would expect. PLEASE
PLEASE PROTECT YOURSELVES.

The men who attacked us were 5 hispanics in their mid to late 20's.
They got away with Erin's purse, which incidentally only had a few credit
cards and only $20 cash. I'd like to think that they were only out looking
to rob somebody, but who knows what could have happened had we not been
able to get help, or if they had weapons, or God forbid, had we been alone
and not together. There are so many "what if''s" that I don't want to
think about....but what I do know is that we are extremely, extremely
lucky that something worse didn't happen to us. I find it ironic that this
happened in front of my church....I really think God was watching out for
us and that is why something worse didn't happen. We were taught a very
valuable lesson.

I wanted to tell everyone what happened to me because I would never want
this same thing to happen to anyone else. I think I just got a little too
comfortable with my surroundings and gained this false sense of security
that "It won't happen to me," "It won't happen in this neighborhood," etc.
etc. etc.

What I think attracted the guys to us is that Erin was carrying a large
purse. I don't even know if they saw my purse because it was a small,
black hand clutch, but Erin had a large light colored shoulder bag. This
may have made us easy targets. Girls please think about then when going
out at night.

For girls and guys both you never know. Crazy people do crazy things, and
especially as this economy is so bad right now....people are getting
desperate and will do terrible, cowardly things to get money or whatever
it is they need. Protect yourself and your friends.


NEVER WALK ALONE. Never walk at night - I'm telling you...the $7 cab ride
is worth it.

Please pass this message along to everyone you know.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.....I hope it was an eye
opener, cause it certainly flipped my life around and the decisions I will
make in the future."

Now, I relayed this story to one of my friends who lives in Lakeview, and he told me that someone attempted to mug him in his garage. I heard another story of someone being beaten up in Buena Park.

So anyway, be careful out there - take cabs and make sure you're with friends when you walk somewhere.

Thanks!

Election Day!

My polling place is in my building, which is really convenient. Every time I've voted, I haven't had to wait. Pretty awesome. Anyway, I got up at 6:30, threw on my workout pants and a hoodie, grabbed my wallet and keys and went downstairs. What I found was a line snaking through my elevator lobby, reception lobby, past the doorman. . .and this isn't even a swing state! I gladly waited, with my unbrushed hair (and teeth. . .eww), my t-shirt from elementary school and hoodie that doesn't match. I watched people fight with the election staff, fret over the line, and walk past the line looking at us like we're nuts for waiting that long.

I have to say though, watching Obama take Pennsylvania, seeing Elizabeth Dole lose. . .and who knows what's to come was worth it. I love feeling like I was a part of what's going on. I'm trying to find a map of Ohio to see how my county (or former county) is going! Stay tuned. . .

Those Weird Little Moments

You know those moments. They make you stop and take stock of what you're doing with your life. I was in improv class today, and as most improv teachers do, mine asked if we had seen any shows that week. I, as usual, kinda just looked around as though I'm so interested in the shows other people saw and couldn't possibly burden them with talk of what I saw. This is akin to raising your hand in class just as someone was being called on, so it looked like you had something to add, when in reality, you didn't. I didn't see any shows. Just like the week before.

Anyway, a girl in my class mentioned that she attended the SNL audition showcase. I found out that someone else, very close to my age was part of that audition showcase. While she is wayyy more advanced than me and has been at this longer, it just makes you think "Crap. I need to step it up. How often are there audition showcases in Chicago? I'll be 40 by the time another one rolls around. I just missed a plum opportunity" Then, I went through improv class thinking "How stupid could I be wishing I was included, I'm not even the best one in this room, let alone this city. Argh. Why am I doing this?"

It sucked. Sucked. Sucked. Sucked. Then I remembered. What's Cheri Oteri doing now? Arguably one of the funniest women of the 1990s and according to IMDB her last movie was Major Movie Star (starring Jessica Simpson). Then I thought of a woman who makes me laugh almost every week - Phyllis Smith (aka Phyllis from The Office). She's not from one of the big comedy schools, yet she's on a hit show. So, there are many paths to achieve the dream. And just because you get on a show like SNL, that doesn't mean that you're guaranteed success. Although, I would like to see Cheri Oteri more. . .surely there's a sitcom out there that's right for her? Please, Hollywood?

Oh, and step 1 on my journey is going to be seeing more shows.